Bedshaped
by Insertrandomusername
Summary: Harry is twenty years old. His Muggle friend ask him to come over and get rid of the homeless guy who's pacing her street. A homeless wizard. Slash, HPDM, OneShot, Lemon, you name it. Yaoi, whatever you like to call it. BoyxBoy.
1. My Apocalypse

"Harry, please come over

A/N: Wohoo, another HarryxDraco fic! I really like those. I've been reading Harry Potter since I was eleven, but I started reading slash just now. Not that it would've been a good thing if an eleven year old girl was reading graphic slash… Oo Or what do yah think? Oh well. Read, enjoy, eat, sleep, or whatever you do when you read.

**Disclaimers: I only own Lyn Bailey, but she's barely in this story at all, so I can't brag about that. And I do own… orange juice. Want some?**

"Harry, please come over?" she purred into the phone. Harry sighed, and rubbed his forehead. Lyn Bailey was sure a pain in the ass sometimes.

"Lyn, I don't have the time right now. You know I have work and such…" he said, and Lyn sighed.

"I know, I know. I just wish you would tell me what your oh-so-secret work is. You're driving me mad, you know," she said, her voice soft. Harry rolled his eyes.

"How many times to I have to tell you? I'm gay. I fancy guys. I don't fancy girls." Lyn sighed: Harry had been right, she had been wishing again.

Lyn Bailey was a Muggle girl Harry had gotten to know after he started working as an auror. She was a nice girl. Persistent, but nice. She didn't know anything about the magic world, since Harry did his best to keep her out of it. He didn't need her interfering in his work or his things, so it was for the best. Besides, Muggles weren't supposed to know about the Wizarding world.

"I know you are. But I'm bored, Harry darling. Please come over?" she begged, and Harry sighed loudly. She wouldn't let him go before he said yes.

"Okay, I'll come over. But I can't stay for long," he warned, and deserved a happy shriek from Lyn.

"Oh, that's okay! I just want to meet you, that's all!" she said happily, and Harry had to smile. She had to be around people all the time, and she talked a lot when she was. She could be very annoying, so she didn't have that many friends, but Harry loved her. She had helped him a lot in the Muggle world, without asking akward questions about his work or friends, or the strange things in his house. He just asked her to leave it, and then she did.

"I'll be right over, bye," he said softly, before he hung up. He sighed – again – and walked out the door.

"There you are!" Lyn said happily, before she pulled Harry into a tight hug. Harry hugged her back, and felt that she was shaking.

"Lyn, why are you shaking?" he asked, surprised. Lyn swallowed, and took a step back. She bit her lip, and looked at the floor. Harry grabbed her chin, and forced her to look at him. She looked frightened.

"No reason." She tried to cover it up with a smile, but Harry held her chin firmly.

"Lyn." She sighed, and moved her eyes down again.

"There's this guy… he's been walking up and down this street for a few days, mumbling things without meaning. He looks like shit: I'm not even sure which colour his hair has! Well, I was scared he'd might try to do something, so I asked him if he could please go away… and then he sneered at me, and said something which didn't make sense at all." Harry dropped her chin. It could be just a normal Muggle hobo, but if he was chanting things that didn't make sense to Lyn, it could might as well be a wizard on the run. A Death Eater.

"When was this?" he asked shortly, and Lyn looked at the watch around her wrist.

"About two hours ago. I think he's still there. Do you mind checking it out for me?" she pleaded, and Harry smiled grimly at her.

"I have to. I can't let anyone hurt my friend." Lyn smiled, and let go of his wrist, which she had been holding since she hugged him.

"Thank you, Harry." Harry turned around, and walked out the door, grabbing a flash-light from the table beside the door. He prefered using lumos when he needed light, but he couldn't use his wand around Muggles. And there were a lot of Muggles around him now. He walked down the stairs, and headed upwards, pointing the flashlight anywhere.

He had been pacing the street for a few minutes, when someone came walking towards him. Harry narrowed his eyes, and pointed the flashlight at the person.

"Bloody Muggle, get away from me!" the shabby person sneered, hiding his face with his hands. Harry sighed: so it was a wizard. He'd think it was a Death Eater, but this person just looked like a pathetic, alcoholic wizard. Probably one of the purebloods that had fallen apart when Lord Voldemort was killed. Harry drew his wand, just in case, and took a few steps closer to the person.

"I am not a Muggle," he said softly, showing the person his wand. The stranger was still hiding his face, so Harry couldn't see anything else than his awfully dirty hair, and his haunted, gray eyes. When Harry stepped closer, so that the person could see him more clearly, his gray eyes widened in surprise and shock. He stumbled back, and Harry furred his brows. Had he done something?

"Don't be afraid, I'll help you," Harry tried, but the person just shot him a vicious glare.

"I don't need your help, get away," he mumbled, now trying to run away. But Harry's hand shot forward, and grabbed his arm.

"I can't let you stay here, I'm sorry. I'll take you to the ministry-" The person interupted him by snapping away his arm, and dropping the cloth that covered his face. Even though his face was covered in dirt, Harry could still recognize that sneer, those hateful gray eyes, and that pointy nose…

"Malfoy?!" he screamed, dropping the flashlight and stumbling back. Malfoy sneered, but didn't try to run away. He just stood where he was, his arms crossed over his chest. Harry refound his balance, and picked up the flashlight. He pointed the flashlight at him, and Malfoy narrowed his eyes.

"Don't point that thing at me," he sneered, and Harry couldn't understand how he hadn't recognized the voice earlier. He turned the flashlight off, and stepped closer, so that he could see Malfoy even in the dark.

"What are you doing here, Malfoy?" Harry asked, his voice silent. Malfoy just huffed: he wasn't going to answer. Harry sighed. He grabbed Malfoy's arm, who jumped and tried to break free.

"Hey, what the fuck are you doing?" he shouted, and Harry pulled him with him.

"You look like shit, you moron. And you can't stay here: you're scaring the Muggles." Malfoy mumbled something, and Harry came closer.

"What?" Malfoy sighed, and stopped struggling.

"Fine. Where are you taking me?" Harry pulled him with him, towards Lyn's house. He had to tell her he was leaving, or she'd be scared out of her mind.

"Home. But first, I have to talk to my friend. She's the one who told me about you." Malfoy picked up a quicker pace, so that he was walking beside Harry.

"Is she the annoying Muggle who's talking all the time?" Harry shot him a deadly glare, and the blond – though you couldn't see it now – pulled his shoulders. Harry sighed, and walked up the stairs, still holding Malfoy's dirty arm. He opened the door, and was greeted by Lyn's shriek.

"Did you find him? Oh…" she said, stopping in the doorway. She was staring at Malfoy, who looked like he was ready to kill. Harry sighed, and rubbed his temple with his free hand. He didn't need all this right now.

"Yes, I found him. I- he's an old… I know him," Harry said at last, and Lyn nodded. She was still staring wide-eyed at the filthy man beside Harry, not blinking once.

"I'll take him with me home. I just came by to tell you," Harry said, his voice tired. Lyn nodded, and ran over to give him a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek. Then Harry turned around, and pulled Malfoy with him. They walked down the street, until they came to a deserted area, where Harry could take Malfoy in a side-along Apparation.

They arrived in front of Harry's house, both exhausted. Harry was tired after working for days, while Malfoy was tired after… well, Harry didn't know what Malfoy had been doing. After Voldemort was killed, the Malfoy family had disappeared totally. Everyone assumed that they were killed: even Harry. He had felt a slight pain in his chest for losing a person he had been fighting with for so long. Ever since the first trip to Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy had been Harry's arch nemesis. They had been fighting for years, and it had just gotten worse. So when Malfoy disappeared, Harry had felt both relived and sad.

"Come on," Harry mumbled, pulling Malfoy with him. The other man yelped, but followed without a word. This made Harry curious beyond compare: four years before, the last time Harry had met the youngest of the Malfoy's at school, he would never let Harry boss him around in any way, not even if it could save his life. But now, Malfoy followed without a word, he even let Harry hold his arm.

Harry decided not to think about it. Instead, he locked them into his house, and told Malfoy to take off his shoes. When he said this, Malfoy just stopped, and stared at Harry. Harry stared back, before he looked down at Malfoy's feet. No shoes, no socks, just bare skin. His mouth formed an 'o', before he looked back up at Malfoy. Hurt was visible in his eyes, and Harry swallowed.

"Well, come on in. I'll let you take a shower, and then I'll find some clean clothes for you." Malfoy nodded, and let Harry guid him into the bathroom. Harry pointed at the shower, and then at the lockets under the sink.

"Towels are in there." Malfoy stared at him for a long time, before he nodded. It was as if the anger he had showed earlier just disappeared. Harry stopped too, and looked at him.

"What?" he asked, and Malfoy turned around.

"Nothing." And then he started to undress, so Harry hurried out. He walked into the livingroom, and sat down in his favourite chair, head in hands. He had walked around for three years, thinking that Malfoy was dead. And then he showed up in a Muggle street, dirty and without hope. He looked like he was ready to lie down and die any moment. Harry felt relived: if he hadn't found him, that might've been what would've happened. And even if he hated Malfoy's guts, he couldn't find it in his heart to wish for him to die.

Half an hour went by, and the water was still pouring down in the bathroom. Malfoy was dirty, but now Harry was getting impatient: he wanted some answers. So he got to his feet, and walked towards the bathroom.

"Malfoy? Are you there?" he shouted. No answer. He knocked again, and still he didn't answer. Harry groaned, and rubbed his temples again. He was getting a headache. He carefully pushed the door open, and looked inside.

Malfoy was sitting on the floor in the shower, his back in the corner and his knees drawn up to his chest, hiding his privates. He was resting his forehead on his knees, and water was pouring down his once again white-blonde hair. Harry swallowed, and stepped inside. He couldn't let him stay like this: he'd drown himself.

"Malfoy, you have to get up," Harry said softly, but Malfoy didn't respond. Harry walked closer, and sat down on his knees in front of him. He stroke away the other man's hair, which now reached his elbows, if Harry had to guess, and tried to force his head up.

"Malfoy, please. Look at me." Malfoy slowly lifted his head, and looked at Harry with his gray eyes.

"What do you want for helping me?" he said, something that shocked Harry. Did he really think he'd make Malfoy pay in some way for rescuing him?

"I don't want anything. Just finish up here and then we'll talk." Malfoy just shook his head, and hid his face in his arms again.

"No, I don't want to. Just let me drown here or something. You don't care anyways." Harry sighed, and got to his feet. He grabbed Malfoy's shoulders, and pulled him up standing.

"I do so care. Don't think I'm still holding old school-grudges against you. Now, I'll help you clean yourself up, and then you'll rest: you're not ready for any questions right now." Malfoy stared at him, face blank. Harry sighed, and reached for the soap behind Malfoy's back. Harry's clothes were soaked by now, since he was standing halfway under the shower. Harry squeezed some of the liquid into his palm, then he rubbed it over Malfoy's shoulders and chest. The blond was staring at him, his eyes wide.

"Why are you being so nice to me? I thought you'd be disappointed when you found out I was alive." Harry had turned Malfoy around, and was now rubbing his back. His skin was still as white as ever, but he was a lot skinnier than he had been. Harry guessed he hadn't been eating very well lately. He felt his heart tighten in compassion. This wasn't the same boy he had been fighting with since first grade. This was a man who needed his help, but was too proud to ask for it. But he had also lost some of his old pride: he simply didn't care what happened to him.

"Because you're not the person I hated." It was a simple answer, which didn't give any room for new questions, so Malfoy didn't ask. Harry looked at his long, unruly hair, and sighed.

"I'll have to cut your hair." Malfoy just nodded, so Harry turned around to find a scissor.

It took some time to get Malfoy's hair straight, but when he managed, it looked just like it had looked like before. Without the hairgel, of course. He still looked like he could use some food and a good nights sleep, but he did look a lot better. When Harry had finished him up, he wrapped him in a towel, and took a step back. He found it hard to hold back a laugh.

Malfoy looked like a child, wrapped in a huge towel from the top of his head to his knees. His thin legs looked even thinner now, and Harry had to let out a little laugh.

"What?" Malfoy asked, his voice grumpy.

"I'm sorry. You just… you look a bit like a child," Harry giggled, holding one hand over his mouth. Malfoy sent him a deathly glare, and Harry burst into laugh. The old Malfoy he knew was back, and he could do nothing but laugh. When he had finished his laughing fit, he looked at Malfoy again, who still looked like a grumpy child who didn't get chocolate. Harry smiled, and opened the bathroom door, shaking a bit when the cold air hit his wet clothes.

"Come on, you can sit in the livingroom while I go up and get some clothes," Harry said, and Malfoy nodded. He followed Harry into the livingroom, where he sat down on the sofa, pulling his feet up under him. Harry opened his mouth to say something, when the doorbell rang. He swore, and ran out to open it. He didn't even think about his wet clothes.

"Yeah?" he said, opening the door. Hermione stared at him, unable to speak. She held a hand over her pregnant stomach, while the other was holding a plastic bag with food. She knew that Harry was very busy lately, so she often brought him food. She raised an eyebrow at his clothes.

"I know that you've been busy lately Harry, but you should take the time to take off your clothes before you shower." Harry blushed, and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Uhm, well… I'll go change now, just… just wait here, okay?" he said, after thinking a little. Malfoy wouldn't say anything, and if Hermione just stayed in the hallway, Harry wouldn't have to explain things just yet.

"Sure. You run and get some dry clothes on, and then you'll tell me why you've been in the shower with your clothes on. Or whatever you have been doing." Harry gave her a weak smile, before he ran back to his bathroom. He quickly found some dry clothes, and walked back to the hallway. It was empty. He felt his heartbeat speed up, and he ran into the livingroom, where Malfoy was sat… talking to Hermione.

"So… what are you going to do now?" Hermione said, as if nothing had happened and she just met Malfoy at the shop where he had been working for four years. Though that wasn't the fact. Harry swallowed, and walked towards them. Malfoy shot him a glance, then he looked back at Hermione, who was smiling at Harry.

"Hey, Harry. You didn't tell me you found Draco, and that he's alive." Harry's eyes widened in surprise. She had called him Draco. His first name. He couldn't remember a single time she had done that. Malfoy was staring at her, with good reason.

"Well… you know now," Harry said, feeling awkward. Hermione smiled, and stood up.

"Yes, I do. Oh well, I'll leave you two alone, goodbye," she said, and with that, she left. All of it – from Hermione arriving and to Hermione leaving – had happened so fast, Harry barely had time to process it. Malfoy was still sitting in the sofa, though, with the towel around his body. He was staring at Harry, wide eyed, and Harry sighed, before sitting down.

"I'll ask you to tell me everything tomorrow, okay? Now you're going to bed," the black haired boy said, and Malfoy nodded. He followed Harry when he got to his feet, and they both walked upstairs, and into Harry's bedroom.

"You can borrow my bed. I'm sleeping on the sofa." Malfoy nodded, but didn't move. Harry stared at him, face blank. Then he blushed. Malfoy didn't have any underwear or pyjama. He made his way over to his closet, and found a clean pair of boxers, and a pyjama shirt he could borrow. He tossed it over to him, and turned around to let him get dressed. When he had finished, Harry turned back, and once again, he had to hide his laugh behind his hand. Harry's boxers were too big for Malfoy, at least around his legs, so he looked ridicolous, and the shirt – which was too big for Harry – was way too big for Malfoy's small frame.

If Malfoy had been anyone else than Malfoy, Harry would've though he was incredibly cute. But it was Malfoy, and even if he wasn't the same person as he was before, he was Harry's old arch nemesis, and he couldn't think things like that about him. His thoughts were interrupted by Malfoy's shout:

"Will you stop laughing at me?! I'm tired of people laughing at me, telling me I'm crap! And you even had the guts to say that you didn't hold any grudges against me anymore, ha! You're just like you was before, you're just _waiting_ for an opportunity to… to… to do whatever you used to do back in school!" Harry's jaw dropped open. Malfoy looked like he was going to jump at him and attack him, scratch out his eyes and break his neck, or something like that. Harry actually backed away one step, and Malfoy groaned loudly, before he turned around and hid his face in his hands. He was making some strange sounds, as if he tried growling and sobbing at the same time.

"Malfoy, I'm sorry, I wasn't laughing that way. You just looked funny, and-" Harry started, but was interrupted by the pillow Malfoy had sent flying in his direction. It hit his head, and he stumbled backwards. Malfoy huffed, and turned around again. He was once again acting like a spoiled brat – or a betrayed woman.

"Seriously, Malfoy. I wasn't laughing at you because I find you amusing." Malfoy just growled, and Harry came closer, fully aware of what angry people could do if they just wanted to. But Malfoy didn't move, so Harry just came closer and closer, until he could place on hand on his shoulder.

"Go away," Malfoy sneered, and Harry rolled his eyes, though Malfoy couldn't see it, since he had his back against Harry.

"Will you even concider listening to me? If I was out to get you in some way, I'd just called the Ministry and let them fix it up. After what I've learned about them, they'd write it everywhere, if they knew that you were alive. But instead, I took you home, and now I'll have some serious thinking to do to keep you away from the Ministry for a while, at least. You're not ready to defend yourself, but you will be. I will make sure of it." When Malfoy turned around, Harry was expecting something like him telling him to fuck off, or a smack in the face. What he didn't expect, was Malfoy placing his hands on his cheeks, and kissing him forcefully. Harry backed away, and Malfoy followed, pushing him on the bed while kissing him again and again.

"What the fuck Malfoy?!" Harry said, as he pushed the thin man away from his lips. There was a hunger in his eyes, something resembling a wild animal, and he pushed Harry down again. Harry couldn't believe he was _this_ strong.

"I haven't had _anyone_ in four years, Potter. Just because you are you doesn't mean I won't let a chance for some sex slip away." Harry's eyes widened in shock, but he couldn't find it in him to push Malfoy away when he once again pressed his lips to Harry's. A soft tongue slipped over his bottom lip, and he opened his mouth, letting Malfoy in.

Malfoy's hands were soft as they slipped under Harry's shirt, burning on his cold skin. Harry arched his back into Malfoy's touch, and the blond gripped his hips, holding him still. Harry grunted, displeased, and Malfoy bit his lip hard.

"What did you do that for?" Harry mumbled, running his hands up and down the blond's body. Malfoy purred, and kissed his neck.

"To stop you from moving." Harry growled, and grabbed Malfoy's waist, and flipped him around. If he just stopped being a whimp, he was stronger than the small man who was now beneath him. Harry grinned down at him, and kissed him, opening his shirt again. Malfoy bit his tongue when Harry slipped it past his lips, before he pushed his own tongue inside Harry's mouth, sucking up the blood he had drawn.

"Will you please behave?" Harry sneered, as they broke the kiss. Malfoy smirked at him, and at that moment, he looked so much like his old self, Harry was wondering what the fuck he was doing.

"I don't like being bossed around, Potter. You should know that." Harry growled, and ripped off Malfoy's shirt, attaching his lips to his white chest. Malfoy moaned loudly, and grabbed Harry's hair. His rock-hard erection was rubbing against Harry's stomach, and Harry felt himself getting just as hard as the blond.

"Damn it, Potter, I'm not a girl! I don't need foreplay," Malfoy panted, janking at Harry's hair. And with that, Harry ripped off Malfoy's boxers which were really his, before he sat up, straddling Malfoy's hips and ripping off his own clothes. It didn't took more than a minute or so before Harry too was naked, and they were once again kissing.

Harry was twenty years old and a virgin. Obviously, Malfoy wasn't, so Harry was not planning on telling him so. He knew how sex worked, he wasn't completely brainless, but he wasn't sure if he would do it right. If he was supposed to be inside _Malfoy_, he might hurt the blond. And even if he still had that old, rotten feeling of hate somewhere inside his heart, he didn't want to hurt the other man.

But Malfoy noticed that Harry was hesitating, and flipped them over again.

"If you're going to keep on acting like a girl, this is the best solution anyways." Harry swallowed, and nodded, letting Malfoy put three fingers inside his mouth to soak them in salvia. Then he brought them down to Harry's ass, and pressed one inside, quickly pulling it back and forth. Harry gasped at the intrution, and clenched his muscles. Malfoy didn't wait for him to adjust – he probably didn't expect Harry to be a virgin – but showed another finger inside, making the pain worse. Harry realized that he had to relax to make the pain go away, and bit his lip to force himself into relaxing.

It wasn't as hard as he though it would be, especially not when Malfoy hit a bundle of nerves inside him, which made him gasp out and arch his back. Malfoy smirked, and added another finger. Harry kept his face blank, as he forced himself to relax again.

"There," Malfoy mumbled, and pulled out his fingers. Harry made a displeased sound: the fingers felt too good. But he shut up when Malfoy grabbed his legs, and wrapped them around his waist. He grabbed his erection, and positioned it on Harry's prepared entrance, before he pushed in roughly.

The pain was so complex, so intense, Harry felt tears run down his cheeks. Malfoy had his eyes closed, so he couldn't see this, and Harry kept himself from screaming out. He placed one hand over his mouth, and squeezed his eyes shut, doing his best to ignore the pain. He couldn't understand how anyone could find pleasure in this.

Soon, it became a dull pain, which throbbed forcefully in Harry's lower back as Malfoy moved. Harry had just managed to relax, as Malfoy picked up a quicker and harder pace, slamming into him with such force, it drew a strangled cry from Harry's throat. Malfoy opened his eyes, and stopped abruptly.

"Oh, Merlin," he mumbled, and bent down, removing Harry's hand from his mouth and kissing him carefully.

"I'm… sorry," Harry said, his voice thick with pain. Malfoy sighed, and pulled out of him. The brunette yelped, and turned over to his side to try and dull the pain. Malfoy rolled of him, and pulled him into an embrace.

"Merlin Potter! You have to tell me if you're a virgin! Do you have any idea how much I could've hurt you?" Harry growled, and refused to look at Malfoy. This was just too embarrasing. The blond sighed, and nuzzled his nose into Harry's neck. He ran his hands over his chest and stomach, before he let them run over his hips, and to his lower back, light like feathers. He slipped them over his bum, massaging carefully. Harry sighed, and tried to relax – again. Malfoy kissed his neck softly, as he slipped his fingers between Harry's ass cheeks, still massaging carefully. He slipped one finger into his abused hole, very, very carefully. It still stung, but Harry moaned softly, and felt himself relax completely under Malfoy's still massaging hands.

The finger moved slowly in and out, deeper for each thrust. After a while, it hit the delicious bundle of nerves, and Harry cried out, moving his hand behind his back and grabbing Malfoy's hip, digging his nails into his skin. Malfoy smirked, and pushed his finger deeper again, making Harry gasp and dig his nails deeper.

After a while, Malfoy decided it was time for another finger, and as carefully as possible, he pushed the next finger inside, stretching him. A whimp escaped Harry's lips, and he once again tightened his grip on Malfoy's hip, this time in discomfort. Malfoy kept on massaging his bum softly to make him relax, while he slipped his fingers in and out, scissoring them carefully. Harry leaned his head back, letting Malfoy kiss his neck tenderly as he scissored him. When the pain eventually turned over and became pleasure, Harry pushed back, trying to make Malfoy push deeper to hit his prostate. The blonde got the hint, and pressed his fingers deeper, feeling around inside him. When he pressed the spot, Harry moaned loudly, and clenched his muscles a little around Malfoy's fingers.

"Mm," Harry mumbled, feeling his heart beat faster in his chest. Sweat was running down his forehead and chest, making his tanned skin shine. Malfoy was kissing and licking his neck, moaning softly. And when Malfoy added another finger, it barely hurt, since Harry's attention was drawn against the massaging and kissing. This time, when Malfoy stretched him, it only felt good, though he could feel the pain lurking if the blonde was a little rough. But he was careful, so careful it made Harry crave for more.

"I'm going to try again now, okay?" Malfoy mumbled into his ear, and Harry swallowed. Then he nodded, and closed his eyes. He forced himself to stay completely relaxed as Malfoy pulled his fingers out, and grabbed his thigh and lifted it up. They were lying on their sides, Malfoy pressed agains Harry's back, and Harry's left leg now raised to give Malfoy better access.

When Harry felt Malfoy's very hard erection nudge his hole again, he bit his lip and opened his mouth, feeling his heartbeat speed up in fear. Malfoy's free hand was stroking his bum, before it moved over his hip to wrap around his waist. Harry took a deep breath, and felt the fear disappear.

Though, he could feel the pain return when Malfoy slowly pushed in, and the urge to clench his muscles also rushed back to him. But when Malfoy felt this, he stopped, and didn't move before Harry was relaxed again. Before Malfoy pushed inside, he had done a lubrication spell with Harry's wand, so that the experience became less painful. Now he filled Harry completely, and the dark haired boy drew in a sharp breath. It hurt, but not even half as much as it did the first time. He felt like the most girlish boy in history, especially concidering that Malfoy was smaller than Harry thinner, not down there.

Malfoy pulled Harry closer, so that it wasn't possible to get anything between their bodies, not even sweat. Then he slowly moved back and forth, trying to reach deep down, without hurting Harry. He slipped his other hand around Harry's waist too, so that both of his arms were wrapped completely around the other boy. Then he pushed inside, a bit rougher than he had before, and Harry gasped, arched his back and grabbed Malfoy's hands. Malfoy smirked. He had found the spot.

"Merlin, Malfoy," Harry moaned, when Malfoy pushed inside again, knowing the pleasure he gave Harry. He picked up a slightly quicker pace, and Harry grabbed Malfoy's hand, bringing it to his mouth and sucking one finger inside his mouth. It tastet salty from their sweat, and Harry closed his eyes, and let his tongue swirl around Malfoy's white fingertips, drawing a moan from the man.

Malfoy grabbed Harry's waist tighter, as he felt the familiar feeling in the pit of his stomach, the burning feeling that told him it would soon be over. He grunted, and buried his face in Harry's shoulder, pushing in deeply. Then he reached down with his free hand, and took a hold on Harry's erection, pumping hard. The dark haired boy let out a strangeled yelp, and bit down on Malfoy's fingertips, while he arched his back. Malfoy sqeezed hard, while he pushed inside, hitting his prostate dead on. Harry's eyes flew open, and he clenched his muscles hard around Malfoy, before he came hard into Malfoy's hand. The pressure around Malfoy's erection was too much: he spilled his seeds deep into Harry, grabbing his waist again and holding onto him hard.

"Nngh…" Malfoy felt his body go limp, and he panted heavily. Harry relaxed, and let Malfoy's hand move from his mouth and down to his chest, stroking it gently.

Malfoy didn't feel like pulling out of the other man, but he did anyways. Harry sighed when he felt Malfoy's now limp limb slip out of him, and he turned around to get an after-sex kiss. Malfoy wrapped his arms tightly around his body again, and kissed him hungrily on the lips. Then they broke apart, and Harry slipped down, resting his head on Malfoy's shoulder. Malfoy…

"I guess it's time to call you Draco," he mumbled, and Draco giggled. He stroke his fingers through the dark hair of the man lying on his shoulder, thinking it was funny how things had turned out. He had been pacing a Muggle street for days, hoping he'd die soon. Now, he was holding his old arch nemesis after having very, very good sex with him, and feeling warm and sleepy.

"Harry," Draco mumbled, as if to try the feeling of saying his name. Harry sighed, and tilted his head back, kissing Draco's chin tiredly. He was exhausted: losing your virginity wasn't exactly a walk in the park. Draco reached after the blankets, and wrapped them around both of them. Harry came closer, and wrapped his legs around Draco's thin waist. Draco felt safer than he had for years.

"Go to sleep. I'll tell you everything tomorrow," Draco mumbled, closing his eyes. He was so tired… Harry was barely awake, as he grabbed Draco's hand, holding it hard.

"Good night. Don't leave." Draco swallowed, and kissed Harry's hair.

"I won't. Go to sleep now." Harry so did, and Draco sighed.

He waited for one hour, until he was sure that Harry was asleep, before he got up from the bed, and pulled on the pair of boxers Harry had ripped off him not long ago. Then he stopped, and looked at the sleeping man on the bed. He swallowed, and a pang of guilt hit him in the chest. Then he reached after Harry's wand, and raised it.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

A/N: So, what do yah think? Angsty enough for you? It wasn't supposed to be angsty. I'm just in a mood now, since I'm stressed out of my mind, so I decided the world needed some angst. Hate it, love it, be totally in-different… leave me a review anyways. They make me happy. And I like being happy. Author out.


	2. Animal I've become

Animal I've become

Animal I've become

"I've done it," Draco said, kneeling in front of the chair. Slim fingers danced over a knee dressed in black, and a smile could be seen in the darkness.

"Finally. You took your time, Malfoy, but you finally did your part. Now you've cleaned up your fathers name, what's you next move? Will you join me, or will you run and hide, like the coward you are?" Draco gulped, and clenched his hand tighter around the wand he had stolen.

"I will join you, my Lord." The man in the chair stood up, and stepped out into the light. He was a tall and handsome man, with dark hair and brown eyes, a strong chin and a slim body. He was spinning a wand carefully around in his hand, while he smiled down at Draco.

"Good. Because I won't let anyone in my way. Get lost." Draco hurried to his feet, and walked out of the room as fast as he could, while the slim man behind him stared after him. He walked around a corner, and into a small room. There, he collapsed on the bed, drawing his knees up to his chest and digging his nails into his palms, feeling hot blood tickle down his wrists.

"I'm sorry, Harry, I'm so sorry," he sobbed quietly, closing his eyes. There was nothing he could do.

_It was raining heavily. There were dead people everywhere, people he used to know… Pansy, Blaise, Crab, Goyle… Draco was standing among them, Pansy's hand almost touching his foot. He was looking forward, because there was a dark figure there, walking towards him._

"_Draco," a voice said, sad and dark. Draco opened his mouth, but he couldn't speak. He reached out his hand, but the dark figure in front of him didn't come closer. Draco tried to walk, but someone grabbed his ancle, making him drop to the ground._

"_You should be one of us, Draco," Pansy's dead body whispered, her empty eyes staring at him. Draco fell to his knees, grabbing his head in his hands, and screamed._

Draco sat up in his bed, panting heavily. He was soaked with sweat, and his body was trembling heavily from the vivid dream. He fell back with a heavy sigh, and wrapped the covers around his thin body. He tried to fall alseep again, but the dream was too real.

He had almost felt Pansy's hand on his ancle, cold and wet. He brought his hand down his leg, touching his right ancle. Nothing. Of course it was nothing, it had been a dream. No matter how alive the dream might seem, it wasn't. He sighed.

He wanted to find Pansy, Blaise, and all his other friends from school again. They thought he was dead, just like everyone else did. But he couldn't. The Dark Lord had him in a choke-hold, and he couldn't escape. He crept closer into the wall, and let out a shaky sob. He had messed up so badly, just because he wanted to do something right for his family's name and honour. Instead, he had broken himself, and hurt others. People he loved, cared about… people like Harry.

"Love, you have to eat some food," the old lady said, as Draco once again refused to eat anything. He shook his head, and started to stand up. But the old lady quickly walked over to him, and pushed him down again.

"Let go of me," Draco sneered, but the lady just gave him a motherly glance.

"No, you're too thin, so you're eating something. Sit down, now," she said, her voice strict, but firm. Draco stared at her, before he sighed, and looked at his food. The old lady crossed her arms over her chest, and smiled. Draco grabbed his fork, and sighed again. He might as well eat something.

"There you go, love. Now, will you tell me your name?" she asked, and Draco looked at her.

"Draco." She smiled, and sat down on a chair to his right.

"I'm Maggie Johnson. Now, how did a nice young man like you end up here? Mr. Riddle isn't quite the person to hang out with, is he now?" she asked, her eyes concerned. Draco looked away, and shoved his food around a little.

"I… I don't have any other choice than to be here. If I go back to the Wizarding world, they'll throw me into Azkaban for sure." Maggie's forehead wrinckled in concern. She reached out, and placed one hand over one of his.

"And what have you done that deserves such punishment?" she said softly, and Draco swallowed. Then he stood up quickly, still without looking at her.

"Thanks for the food. I'm going to bed." And with that, he left the room.

Nightmares were still haunting him the second he fell asleep, so Draco tried staying awake for as long as possible. He would drink coffee all day to stay awake, until he almost fainted at the end of the day. He met Maggie during meals, since she was the one who cooked for him, and he became used to having her around. She would ask him questions he didn't want to answer, and she would fuzz around him when he didn't eat his food, but even if she did that, Draco couldn't help but like her. She was like the grandmother he was supposed to have, the family he had never gotten, and he liked it. She cared for him only, she didn't even care for The Dark Lord like she cared for him, and he enjoyed it, though he wouldn't show it.

He couldn't look himself in the mirror anymore. He barely looked like a shadow of his old self. His hair was thin, his skin was gray, and his eyes were haunted. He looked like an insomniac, and he moved like a frightened squirrel: always on guard.

"Will I ever escape this?" he whispered into the dark, as he did every night. No one answered.

"Dear, what's worrying you? I can see it in your face," Maggie said, and Draco looked away. He was seated in the library, the one The Dark Lord never used, and Maggie had brought him some tea and crackers. Now she sat down in a chair, and looked at him, demanding an answer with her eyes.

"It's nothing. Nothing I can do anything about, at least." Maggie sighed, and reached after his hand. She held it firmly, and he didn't pull away. The feeling of having someone love him in some way was too good to shake off.

"You can do anything you want, if you just put your will into it. Now, will you tell me why you're here? Why aren't you running around with a pretty girl, building a family?" she asked softly, and Draco blushed. He didn't feel like telling the old lady everything about himself, but a few details didn't hurt.

"I'm here because I did something horrible, and this is the only sanctuary I've got. And I'm not running around with some girl because I do not like girls." Right after he had spoken those words, it hit him that Maggie might not be that into homosexuality, and if that was the case, he'd lose the only person he could talk to. But the old woman just sqeezed his hand, and smiled at him.

"Well, then why aren't you running around with some handsome boy? I'm sure a guy like you can get whoever he wants. You look a bit tired now, but it's nothing old Maggie can't fix." Draco looked down at his hand, and swallowed. He couldn't tell her what he had done to the only boy he wanted.

"It's no use. When the Lord… takes over, I won't have the time for a boyfriend," he said silently, and the second after, he was pulled into a hug. Maggie stroked his hair gently, and Draco swalloed again. Then he melted into the embrace, and held her hard. He had missed having someone to look after him.

"Oh, love. Everything'll be all right, you see. I'm sure you haven't done anything that dreadful." Draco sobbed quietly, and clenched his hands around the fabric of her dress. He allowed himself to bury his face in her shoulder, crying silently. Maggie stroke his back up and down, humming lightly on a tune Draco had never heard before.

_Words like violence_

_Break the silence_

_Come crashing down_

_Into my little world_

It was a calm and collected song, and Draco felt himself relax. After a while, he could sit up and wipe away the tears. Maggie smiled at him, and stroke away some hair from his face.

"See, darling? Things'll be all right. I'll make sure you'll get out of here in one piece. Now, why don't we clean you up a bit? Even if you won't be going out for a while, it's no shame in looking good, is it?" she said softly, and helped him to his feet. He was taller than her, but she still managed to look like he was a five-year-old, lost boy. He nodded, and let her push him towards the bathroom. She filled the huge bathtub, and ordered him to undress and climb into it. He so did, and she sat down to scrub his back.

"Maggie, can I ask you a question?" Draco suddenly said, and Maggie smiled at him, while shampooing his dirty hair.

"Of course, love. But I can't promise that I'll answer." Draco nodded, and stared at the wall. He was quite sure she had predicted what he'd ask her, and that was why she warned him.

"Why are you here?" Maggie sighed, and ordered him to lean his head back, so that she could wash out the shampoo and apply some conditioner.

"I can't answer that question, love. But I can tell you that every child has someone who loves him, no matter how he might be when he's grown up." Draco closed his eyes as she massaged his sculp, and sighed. He didn't expect her to tell him what her connection with The Dark Lord was, but he still felt disappointed.

"Now, get out and dry yourself up. While you do that, I'll go find some clean clothes. I'll be right back, love," Maggie said, and handed him a towel. He got up, quickly covering his privates, and she walked out of the bathroom, leaving him to himself. He looked himself in the mirror, before he had to turn away. The guilt he felt was like a venom, eating him slowly from the inside. He fell to his knees, towel wrapped around his thin body, trembling. He planted his hands on the floor in front of him, and gasped for breath. Then he panicked. He couldn't get any air! He felt his lounges flat out, and his throat felt like it had been blocked by a potato. He gasped and gasped, and black and white dots danced in front of his eyes.

"Draco! Draco, breathe, calm down, love, breathe," Maggie said softly, rubbing his back. Draco nodded, and closed his mouth, drawing damped, hot air through his nose. Then he let it out again through his mouth, sighing happily. Then he repeated the action a few times, before he fell against the wall, wrapping the towel tighter around his body. Maggie stroke his wet hair away, and a worried wrinkle was visible on her forehead.

"Thank you," Draco mumbled, grabbing her hand. She held him firmly, stroking his forehead over and over again.

"Any time, love."

A/N: Gaah, I've never had that much trouble writing a second chapter Oo I just had to get the story started, and that's the hard bit…

Now, I'm giving you a chaptered fic, BUT! yes, there's always a BUT, it'll take a long time. I mean, I'm not going to update every other week or so, it might take a couple of months for me to write a chapter. I know it sounds like much, but I'll be working all summer, and then I'll be leaving for England, which means I won't have the time to use my computer that much. But I'll do my very best, since you wanted a chaptered fic. Now, I'll try to get the next chapter up soon, because I know what to write this time. Ideas are very welcome, remember that I haven't written the next chapter yet!


	3. Zetsu

Zetsu

Zetsu

A/N: Okay, so this chapter isn't the longest of chapters, but it's a chapter, so smile and be happy. I know this chapter sucks, plus it's short, but I'm having serious problems writing this fic. But I really like reviews, besides, I do like this story, even if it's hard to write xD

"Blimey, mate. You really have to get out of bed," Ron said, dropping down on Harry's bed. Harry huffed, and pulled the covers tighter around his body. He hadn't been in the mood for talking to anyone for the last few days.

"Ron, just leave him alone. Finish cleaning, and then we can leave," Hermione said from the door, stroking her stomach. Ron sighed, and got to his feet. He walked over to his girlfriend, but he threw one last glance at the man in the bed.

"Harry, please, just get out of the bed. I miss you, mate." When Harry didn't answer, Ron just sighed, and closed the door behind him.

Harry could hear them walk down the stairs, and then he sat up. He just hadn't been able to do anything since Draco left. When Harry woke up the next morning, expecting to find Draco by his side. Instead, he found some of his clothes and money missing, and his wand on the floor, as if someone dropped it. And no Draco. He couldn't believe it first, and then he thought it was a dream. But Hermione confirmed the fact that Draco was there, and the soreness in his ass confirmed the fact that they had sex.

So after both alternative one and alternative two was eliminated, he had to settle with the fact that Draco had fooled him. He agreed to do it just because he needed something to survive, and then he probably thought about killing Harry, or maybe obliviate him A/N: moodkiller, but I had to put it in the story, because everyone thought he did it xD, but then Harry must've been close to woking up, and Draco dropped the wand and ran away. That made Harry moody and depressed, and he really didn't feel like hanging around other people. He knew he had to snap out of it eventually, but he didn't feel like doing it today.

"I'm such an idiot," he mumbled, dragging himself over the floor towards the door. He opened it, his eyes glued tiredly to the floor, and walked down the stairs, supporting himself against the wall.

He walked into the bathroom to unload himself, hanging onto the doorknob. He hadn't eaten for days, and he knew he was acting like a spoiled three-year-old baby, but he didn't quite feel like behaving like an adult right now.

"Skip, skip, skip to the loo," he mumbled, as he zipped up his fly up and cleaned his hands. He made his way into the kitchen to see if he had something easy to eat, like noodles. He didn't find anything else than crackers, but he grabbed those, and slopped his way up into his bedroom. He climbed under the covers, and sighed. He pulled a cracker out of the pack, and ate it slowly. He'd let himself feel miserable for another day.

--

"Harry! How good to see you!" Hemione smiled, hugging him tightly. He let himself be hugged, and patter her back awkwardly.

"It's good to see you too, Hermione," he said soflty as she pulled away. She gave him another smile, before she walked over to the couch, hand pressing on her lower back for support. She was now very pregnant, and she had problems walking properly. Ron came into the livingroom, after he had walked into the kitchen to get something to eat and drink for Harry, and grinned at his friend.

"How are you, mate? Come sit, mom dropped by with some cookies last night." Harry nodded, and walked over to the couch to sit down. Ron dropped the cookies on the table, and sat down in a chair nearby.

"It's good to see you outside again, Harry," Hermione said, and Harry smiled again. He shifted in his seat, and Ron grabbed a cookie. He hadn't changed at al since the school says.

"Well, yeah," Harry answered, and Ron looked at him. the red haired boy didn't know why Harry had been hiding inside lately, and Hermione didn't know everything.

"So, why did you hide in your house all day and such? It seems like you two have some secrets I don't know," Ron said, his voice witnessing hurt. Hermione looked at Harry, who looked away and took a bit of his cookie. But he was too nervous about Ron finding out, so he choked on it, and almost got himself killed. Hermione patted his back carefully, and Ron leaned forward.

"It's nothing, really," Harry mumbled when he was done choughing, and Ron sighed.

"I wish you'd tell me, mate." Harry looked at him, and felt a pang of guilt in his heart. Ron was just trying to help, but Harry didn't let him. Maybe he just should tell him what was going on…

"Ron, it's quite… embarrasing," Harry mumbled, now looking away again. Ron sighed, and patted his shoulder.

"No worries, mate. I'll handle it." Harry nodded, and knitted his hands together.

"I'm gay." Ron pulled his shoulders. That wasn't something new for him.

"I knew that." Harry nodded, and took a deep breath. Then he hid his face in his hands a few seconds.

"I just had to make sure you did. Well… I slept with someone." Ron sat up, and made a face.

"Blimey, mate, I don't have to know everything about everything you do…" he started, but Harry cut him off.

"I'm not telling you any details, damn it!" Ron rolled his eyes. Harry sighed, and figured he'd just tell him as fast as possible. It wouldn't be any easier if he waited.

"Then what's the problem?" Ron asked, and Harry braced himself.

"I slept with Draco Malfoy." Silence. Complete, utter silence. Harry hid his face again, he couldn't stand looking at his red haired best friend at the moment. Then…

"So… he's alive?" Ron said, his voice not giving away anything. Harry nodded, face still in hands. And then… laughing. Harry looked up, only to find Ron sitting in the chair, laughing loudly. Harry raised an eyebrow, and leaned back, folding his arms over his chest.

"What's so funny?" Harry growled, and Ron giggled, drying away some tears.

"You slept with Draco Malfoy? Blimey, that's just…" He shook his head, and giggled a bit more. Hermione sighed, and gave Harry a look. He pulled his shoulders, and smiled slightly.

"Well… he kind of… ran away," Harry said then, and Ron fell serious again. He grabbed Harry's wrist, making him look at him.

"And that's why you've been sulking? Did you like him that good?" he said, and Harry sighed.

"Well… he's different from what he was before. I can't explain," Harry mumbled, and Ron dropped his wrist. Then he patted his shoulder, and smiled slightly.

"It's okay. I mean, nobody understands why I'm with Hermione," he grinned, deserving a smack by his girlfriend. He leaned back again, and Harry looked at him again.

"Thanks." Ron smiled at him.

"No problem. That's what friends are for, right?"

--

"Ron, seriously! I'm not going," Harry said, irritated. Ron poked his arm, and grinned.

"Yes, you are! I set you up with this guy I know, he's really great, and-" Harry cut him off by a smack in the head.

"I'm not going, I said! No matter how great your friend is," he said, crossed his arms over his chest and huffed. Ron groaned in defeat, and looked at his girlfriend for help. Hermione just giggled and shook her head, looking down in the book she was reading.

"You got yourself into this, you're getting yourself out," she said, before she put on her 'reading-face', which ment she'd be gone for this world for at least one hour. Ron groaned again, and looked at Harry, his eyes big.

"Please, mate. I promised him I'd take you with me," he said, and Harry rolled his eyes.

"As Hermione said, you'll have to fix this yourself. I'm not going." Ron sighed, and fell over the table, smacking his forehead hard against the polished surface. Harry laughed, and patted his friend's back.

"You'll live, mate. Now, you better get in touch with your buddy and tell him he'll be going alone tonight." Ron nodded, and dragged himself over to the phone. Then he remembered that since his friend was a wizard, he probably didn't have a phone, and even if he had, Ron didn't have his phone number, and walked out in the hallway to find an owl to use. Harry just shook his head and giggled a little, turning around again. Hermione was still busy with her book, so Harry leaned back in the chair, closing his eyes. Ron could really be a pain in the ass sometimes.

A/N: Well, not the longest of chapters, but I figured people wanted to know if Harry was still alive, neh? I'll write a longer chapter next time, but I'm really struggling with this story, so sorry if it takes some time Reviews are love! Oh, and for those who wonder about the chapter title: "Zetsu" is the Japanese word for "desperate".


	4. Damn Regret

Damn Regret

Damn Regret

A/N: Aaah, finally! I managed to get another chapter up and going! This is getting exhausting, it feels like I've ran ten miles now! Okay, maybe not that exhausted, but it's tireing indeed! Now, read and be happy! Or sad… I'm not sure if this is a happy story Oo

"Good morning, love!" Maggie said, and opened the curtains. Draco groaned, and pulled the covers over his head. The light was too bright this early in the morning, especially when it got reflected by the snow.

"Good morning, Maggie," he grumbled from under the covers. He couldn't remember what he had dreamt, but it was a good dream. Harry was in it. His stomach clenched, and he suddenly felt sick. Harry… the night Harry had found him, he was sure he'd fail. He had been pacing whole fucking England for months without any luck in finding Harry, and in the end ended up in the Muggle street. He was terrified The Dark Lord would come after him and kill him, or send someone else. He was useless if he couldn't kill Harry Potter. And then he saw him. It was as if it was destined. But Harry hadn't attacked Draco, or shipped him away to Azkaban. He took him in, and helped him. He let him have a shower, food, and clean clothes. He even cut his hair for him, helping his self-confidence a little. Then they had sex. And Harry had been so helpless… Draco curled into a little ball under his nice, warm covers. He had raised the wand, he was prepared to rip away that beautiful creature… then Harry had mumbled his name in his sleep, a smile on his lips. That's when Draco knew he couldn't do it. He could never have done it.

"Are you asleep?" Maggie asked, stopping by his bed. Draco pulled away the covers, and sat up.

"No, I was just thinking." He put his feet down on the floor, and rubbed his forehead. Why was he who he was? Why couldn't he just be a normal boy, someone who could live with Harry without feeling guilt of fear? Why did he have to hide? Why did he have to go against that one person that made his heart feel too big for his chest, that made him want more, more, more? Why? Why couldn't he just disappear, so that The Dark Lord couldn't find him, and Harry couldn't find him, and the Department couldn't find him? He had fought too much and too hard to just die, but he could hide. He could run away… no. Someone would find him, and the punishment would be more cruel than he could even think about. He sighed, and got to his feet. Maggie was following him with her eyes, looking for something that would give away what he was thinkning. But Draco never gave away what he was thinking: he simply had too much on his mind.

"Are you all right, dear?" Maggie asked, her voice concerned. Draco shot her a quick glance, and smiled.

"Yes, I'm no worse than I've been. I think I'll go take a bath before breakfast. Is that okay?" Maggie hushed him off to the bathroom, smiling.

"Go clean yourself up, kid."

--

He sat down in front of the toilet, feeling sick. His stomach clenched, and he doubled over, vomiting into the toilet. The taste made him feel even more sick, and he vomited over and over again, until he had emptied everything that had been in his stomach, even the stomach acid. His stomach kept clenching, making him double over again and again, making absurde noises as his body tried getting rid of whatever made him sick. But it couldn't, because it wasn't compact – it was mental.

When he finally stoppet dry-vomiting, he got to his shaking feet, flushing away the disgusting substance in the toilet. He walked over to the sink, staring at his gray face. He looked horrible, but the only difference from before, was that he was paler. He had looked like this for years now, and he even looked a little better now than he had done before Harry found him. He cleaned his mouth, avoiding the mirror. He didn't need to look into it to know how he looked.

He turned on the water, sitting down in the empty bathtub. He shuddered, since it was pretty cold on his skinny body. He drew his knees up to his chest, and wrapped his arms around his knees, burying his face in his arms. He closed his eyes, holding his breath for some seconds. As the water slowly filled the tub, giving his body even more goosebumps, he started daydreaming. The picture in his head was so clear, he could almost feel Harry's fingers on his shoulders, caressing the slightly chilly skin. He pictured how his fingers would run through his hair, and over his face, lovingly, as if Draco was something that was easily broken, like glass.

"Harry, please help me," Draco whispered. He knew no one could hear him, and he forced himself to be happy about that. Harry would be in great danger if he were to rescue Draco from The Dark Lord, so it was for the better if he stayed where he was, and forgot all about Draco. But just as he thought that, a wave of fear washed through him. Harry couldn't forget about him. He just couldn't! Draco forced himself to relax, and empty his mind. Now was not the time to be thinking about that. Harry was where he should be, and Draco was where he had chosen to be.

--

"You said you had done the job." Draco had never been so afraid in all his life. He was sitting on his knees in front of The Dark Lord, shaking violently. He had his eyes glued to the floor, scared of what he'd see if he looked up. He swallowed, and nodded once. The crucio hit him like an arrow, the pain starting from one point, and spreading all over his body. He rolled over to his back, and screamed. Suddenly, the pain was gone, just as sudden as it had started.

"You lied to me. And on top of that, Harry Potter is still alive. All because of you." The pain started again, and Draco screamed louder, so loud the windows shook. The Dark Lord dispelled the curse, and walked closer to Draco. He sat down on his knees in front of him, and grabbed his chin, forcing him to look at him.

"You couldn't do it. You couldn't even lift that wand and kill him, you worthless piece of shit. Was it because he fucked you? Did it feel so good, you couldn't kill him?" Draco squeezed his eyes shut. He didn't want to hear this. He didn't want The Dark Lord to know things like that. But of course he knew. The Dark Lord knew everything. Draco was just beyond surprised he hadn't found out about his lie earlier. A strong hand wrapped around his neck, and lifted him up.

"You're a disgrace. I should just kill you right now. What use are you for me now?" he sneered, and Draco tried to swallow. But his adam apple wouldn't go past The Dark Lord's hand, and he was suffocating slowly. He was standing on his toes, though he barely touched the ground. He felt the blood pump violently in his head, and black and white sparks appeared before his eyes. He grabbed the hand that was holding his neck desperately, trying to get it away. But The Dark Lord just tightened his grip, hissing at him.

"John! Drop him at once!" someone shouted, just as the world became black in front of his eyes. He was dropped down on the floor, and the world returned, piece by piece. It was like a jigsaw puzzle, piece by piece. The person who had told The Dark Lord to drop him, sat down next to Draco and pulled him up sitting.

"Are you all right, love? Can you hear me?" Maggie's gentle voice said, stroking away his hair. The Dark Lord was still towering over them, like a building.

"Get him out of here. I don't want to see him before my eyes ever again." Maggie huffed loudly, but pulled Draco up standing. He was a little shaky, so Maggie had to hold his arm tightly, so that he wouldn't fall down. She guided him slowly towards the door, speaking comforting and couraging words in his ear as he walked. Just before they walked out the door, Maggie stopped and turned around.

"John, if I see you harming this boy ever again, I will personally deal with you. Is that clear?" No reply. "Is that clear, I said?" Maggie sounded nothing like the loving, caring woman Draco knew. She sounded like a real Dark Witch, her voice like a breath of wind from the North Pole and filled with warnings.

"Yes, ma'am." Draco almost fell down when he heard these words. The Dark Lord, calling someone 'ma'am'? And allowing himself to be bossed around? He didn't have time for anymore thinking, because Maggie guided him out in the hallway.

"Come now, love. We'll get you right back to bed, and you're going to stay there until I say it's dinner." Draco looked at her, and nodded. He just felt exhausted and beaten, he didn't want to do anything anymore. If he was allowed to, he would go to bed and stay there for the rest of his life. He'd just be happy if nobody would feed him, then he might die. He wouldn't mind dying now, though he wouldn't kill himself. That was too cowardly.

They arrived outside his door, and Maggie opened it. She pushed Draco inside and towards the bed, before she gave him a stern look.

"Go to bed, now. I'll wake you up later. And don't think too much about what he said to you. Just sleep." Draco nodded, though he didn't look at her. He just walked over to his bed, and started undressing. He could hear Maggie sigh, before the door was closed. He stared at the floor, his shirt in his hand. Crying. Why couldn't people do something else when they were upset? Why crying, showing a sign of weakness? Couldn't they turn into a monster and start ripping people apart when they were sad? But no, humans had to cry. Draco felt his knees shake, so he let himself fall down. He was now on his hands and knees, struggling to keep his tears back. But for no use

"Bloody crying," he whispered, tears running down his face, mixing with snot. He kept his sobbing silent, so that no one would notice. He pressed his forehead against the floor, and tried to calm his breath. But it just got worse, his whole body was now shaking from the sobbing. He rolled over to his side, and curled up into a little ball. He wrapped his arms around his knees, and buried his head into his knees. He was so messed up.

--

"Are you sure you are able to do so?" The man nodded quickly. You didn't oppose The Dark Lord. A sigh was heard, and the man in the chair got to his feet. He walked over to the kneeling man on the floor, and grabbed his chin.

"You have to be absolutely sure. Because if you fail, I will kill you. It won't be quick, and it won't be nice. Remember that. It will be slow, and it will be painful. I am not a nice man. But I need you to do this. It's of great importance that this job is done, and that it is done quickly. Nice and clean. Get it?" The man tried to nod, but The Dark Lord held his chin tightly.

"Y-yes, Lord. I understand." The Dark Lord studied him a little more, before he let go. He walked over to his throne, and sat down. He tapped his fingers lightly on the table next to the throne, his nails making a ticking sound. The rings on his fingers made metallic sounds as they clicked together, echoing through the dark room. His face was hidden by the shadows, but the man on the floor didn't dare look up. He worked for the last Dark Lord, but he didn't know how this Dark Lord worked. He didn't know how his mind worked, or what he was planning. It made him nervous.

"Are you afraid of me? Don't lie, I can see it in your face. You're thinking about all the horrible things I can do to you. Or who knows if I actually do things like that? Maybe I just bark, and don't bite. Do you think so? Do you think I'm harmless?" The man on the floor shook. That was the last thing he would think of The Dark Lord. He could imagine what he was capable to, he had heard his speeches, heard him talk about Voldemort's many flaws. It was things no one had noticed before, but when The Dark Lord pointed them out, it was as if lightbulbs were lit over the Death Eaters heads.

"I will accomplish the mission, Lord," the man on the floor said silently, keeping his head down. All he wanted, was to get out of the dark room, and start his mission. The Dark Lord laughed. It was a cold laugh, like a breath of icy wind.

"Go. Sneak away, like the coward you are. Find the boy, and bring him to me. And do it quick, and do not fail. You don't want to disappoint me." The man on the floor nodded quickly, and hurried to his feet. He bowed to The Dark Lord, before he turned around and almost ran out the door. The glossy light outside hit him in the face, and he sighed relieved. Even if he was a sneaky person, he prefered the light. In the dark, he couldn't see his enemies. And seeing his enemies, targeting them, was his speciality. Without the light, he'd perish.

--

"Time for dinner, darling," Maggie said, shaking Draco's shoulder lightly. Draco groaned silently, and sat up. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, and blinked at Maggie. She had his dinner on a bedtray, one of those you put over your lap while you're in bed. He gave her a grateful glance, as she put the pillows up against the headboard, so that Draco could lean against it comfortably. Then she put the tray over his lap, and sat down in the chair next to his bed.

"Thank you, Maggie," Draco said, grateful. Maggie just smiled, and squeezed his arm.

"It's okay, darling. Just eat now, you really need it. You're still too thin," she said, her eyes wandering critically over his skinny body. Draco looked at the food, and swallowed. He wasn't really that hungry, but he knew Maggie would force him to eat it no matter what. So he grabbed his spoon, and dipped it down in the soup, stirring it around a few times. Then he raised it to his mouth, and took a sip. It was warm, but not too warm, and it slipped easily down is throat. As usual, Maggie's food tasted wonderful, but as usual, Draco wasn't hungry. But he forced it down, bit by bit. When he was done, he sighed, and leaned back on the pillows. Maggie took the tray away, and put it on a table in a corner. Then she walked over to the windows, and opened the curtains. Cool light flooded into the room, bathing the pale figure in the bed with light.

"Hey, Maggie?" Draco asked silently. Maggie kept fuzzing around with the curtains and such.

"Yes, darling?" Draco looked up at her, feeling awfully lonely.

"Why are you so nice to me? I'm just trash. There's no one who would mind if I disappeared. So why do you care about me?" Maggie stopped her fuzzing, and looked at him. She was smiling, and her eyes were shining lightly with tears.

"Love, it's impossible for me not to care about you. You're lost, and you need love. Besides, you're a very nice young man. I'll be surprised if nobody misses you. What about the young man John talked about?" Draco blinked, and tried to remember who John was. In a flash he remembered that John was the name Maggie had called The Dark Lord by. He blushed, and swallowed, looking down at his hands.

"I… he… we hated each other at school. I don't think one night would've changed that. And you heard what The Dark Lord said, I was supposed to kill him. But I couldn't. I just left. He have to hate me." Maggie sat down on the bed, and took one of Draco's hands in hers. She squeezed it lightly, and smiled at him. She still had some tears in her eyes, but she looked more determined now.

"You don't know that. You don't even know if he really hated you before. Maybe it was something else?" Draco shook his head. It had definetly been hate.

"It was hate. I'm sure of it. At least I hated him. I hated him for being so bloody perfect, for being so famous. Everyone knew who he was, and he always got away with everything. Well, maybe it wasn't hate. Maybe it was envy." Maggie squeezed his hand.

"Maybe it was envy on his side too, darling." He stared at her. Why should Harry envy him? There wasn't anything special about him… then he stopped himself. To Harry, there was something special about Draco. He had a family. He had a family, a home, a house. To Harry, Draco had everything. He hadn't thought of it that way before. His head was hurting, and all he wanted to do, was to sleep and sleep, until there was no memories left. Until he forgot everything.

A/N: Okay, so I planned on making this chapter longer, but I'm drained for ideas! Seriously, I'm just completely drained. As always, ideas are welcome! Now, I'm going to England in twelve days guess who's looking forward to leaving Norway?, and I won't have that much time to write then. I will write this year, it's not as if I'm going to just abandon you all! You're all so amazing!


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